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Blog Profile / The Superficial


URL :http://thesuperficial.com
Filed Under:Pop Culture / Celebrity
Posts on Regator:13636
Posts / Week:40.6
Archived Since:April 22, 2008

Blog Post Archive

Derek Jeter: ‘First, You Eat My Butthole Then You Get The Gift Basket’

One of my most favorite things I’ve learned from my all years on the site is that Derek Jeter gives women gift baskets full of Yankees memorabilia after he’s done banging them. It’s a story that not only fills me with hope, but lifts my spirits when this world doesn’t make any sense. Except now Read More...

Kate Hudson Sees Dead People

In an interview with a British radio show, Kate Hudson revealed she once saw a woman’s ghost which is all the excuse I need to repost these bikini photos of her ass. That other stuff I was talking about via Us Weekly: Hudson, who appeared on the U.K. talk show alongside Wish I Was Here Read More...

Leonardo DiCaprio Rapping Is Unfortunate

Leonardo DiCaprio has taken special pleasure in shooing Justin Bieber away not only once, but twice this summer. Which is hilarious and awesome and why I even get up in the morning, but tends to lose its credibility when Leo himself tries to rap even though Justin Bieber has demonstrated that white people should never Read More...

Ariana Grande’s Life Coach Quit

Seen here performing at The iHeart Radio Music Festival over the weekend, Ariana Grande is looking more and more like an out-of-control diva who hopes her fans fucking die because now comes word that her life coach quit months ago after getting tired of her shit. Page Six reports: We’re told that the 21-year-old rising Read More...

Good Morning, Amanda Cerny, And Other News

- Amy Adams is probably going to win another Oscar. - Don’t pay money to see Lauryn Hill. - Future Lower Back Problems means big breasts. In case that was too subtle. - Paula Patton is winning. - David Bowie does a better Tilda Swinton than Tilda Swinton’s David Bowie. Read More...

There Is.. Another.. Fappening

NOTE: This is not a leaked photo of Kim Kardashian. This is the shit she gives away for free. The last time I covered The Fappening our servers broke for two weeks, so if it’s Monday morning and there’s nothing but a crater where the site once was, avenge me. Now that that out’s of Read More...

The Most Important People on The Internet: Volume 4.24

Welcome to this week’s installment of The Most Important People on The Internet where I hope you like jokes about Michael Bay and the Amy Winehouse statue because that’s what literally half of these are. They were your muse. Anyway, we’ve got a short gallery, but it’s probably one of the more darker, so whatever’s Read More...

The Crap We Missed – Friday 9.19.14

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed where for some strange reason, every photo I picked today was a giant giggling butt. Like Nina Agdal up there. Check out that giant giggling butt on her chest! Totally weird, right? Or how bout Jean-Claude Van Damme karate chopping through a giant giggling ice butt. Where’d they Read More...

SUGAR BEAR DONE CHEATED ON MAMA JUNE!

Somebody is having sex with the dude in this picture besides the giant woman next to him. That’s literally what you’re about to read because our reality is a bottle of Mountain Dew colliding with a Mentos: Pure chaos. TMZ reports: Mama June and Sugar Bear Thompson are done — separated — because she’s convinced Read More...

And Now Courtney Stodden’s Breasts

Originally, I was going to write a post about Jonathan Dwyer head-butting his wife for not having sex with him, but then I saw these pics of Courtney Stodden’s breasts and decided we needed 30 photos of them because they look all weird. As for which of those topics would’ve opened a more beneficial dialog, Read More...

That Deadpool Test Footage Worked

After getting stuck playing an absolute shithouse version of the character in X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Ryan Reynolds will finally get a chance to star in a solo Deadpool movie – a project he’s pursued since 2003 – that will presumably be R-rated considering the spark was the leaked test footage (above) he made years ago Read More...

How Dare Mere Muggles Tell Gwyneth Paltrow Not To Ride Her Vespa?!

Last year, Gwyneth Paltrow was filmed cutting off a school bus (above) with her Vespa as her daughter rode behind her because the laws of physics are a beggar’s game. Except apparently the lowly mortals who call themselves “school chiefs” felt they had the authority to dictate Gwyneth’s means of conveyance while sloughing her children Read More...

Jennifer Lopez & Iggy Azalea Hope You Like Asses

So remember Nicki Minaj’s “Anaconda” video? Apparently Jennifer Lopez and Iggy Azalea did because here’s their video for “Booty” which makes “Anaconda” look like a shitty ripoff of “Baby Got Back” but with Nicki Minaj’s fake butt bouncing around. And if you’re thinking to yourself, “Wait, wasn’t it supposed to look like that?” poor Photo Read More...

Good Morning, Chelsea Heath, And Other News

- Chris Martin‘s singing for Jennifer Lawrence at his concerts now. - Matthew McConaughey is officially not in Magic Mike XXL. THIS WORLD MUST BURN. - Bouncing Breast GIFs. Don’t resist them. - Lindsay Lohan looks.. healthy? No, that can’t be right. - GWAR has a new lead singer named Read More...

The Crap We Missed – Thursday 9.18.14

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed where we abandon our creepy theme for straight-up buttcrack, because we’re clickwhores who feed on pageview dollars. That said, You’ll Never Believe What Happens After Quincy Jones Suckles At Queen Latifah‘s Neck. Also, If You Only Look At One Pic Today, It Has To Be This One Of Read More...

A Lady Gaga Post? Okay, Why Not?

So remember Lady Gaga? Weird nose, kind of a Madonna thing going on? It’s not important. Anyway, here she is in Athens yesterday where she did a bunch of stuff with her tits and ass which I’m now posting on the Internet for people to get boners from because journalism isn’t always NFL players beating Read More...

The Other Models Are Mean To Kendall™, You Guys

Kendall Jenner genuinely believes her modeling career is solely the result of “hard work,” and being like super pretty, but even models whose diets consist of a sprig of kale and heroin know it’s because someone who fell out of the same vagina as her got peed on in a sex tape. In Touch Weekly Read More...

Avril Lavigne & Chad Kroeger Headed For Divorce

Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger already shat in our ears musically, so what other purpose could their marriage possibly serve after that? It did what Satan intended it to do, and now it’s time for her to fuck some other shitty band from my freshman year of college. Us Weekly reports: “It’s over,” a source Read More...

Mexico Wants To Kill Miley Cyrus Now

If Breaking Bad taught me any lessons in life, it’s that a man shouldn’t have to ask for some goddamn pancakes, and that Mexico will cut your head off and stick it onto an exploding turtle. Which is why I couldn’t be more excited to tell you that it hates Miley Cyrus now. TMZ reports: Read More...

Jenny McCarthy Lost Her Wedding Ring Already

Because Jenny McCarthy is like super hilariously dumb, you guys – haha, snort – she already totally lost her wedding ring, and she hasn’t even been married a whole month! farrrt But definitely listen to her for medical advice though. Us Weekly reports, and brace yourself to not reads the words, “I thought it was Read More...

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