Blog Profile / Passive-Aggressive Notes

Filed Under:Humor
Posts on Regator:890
Posts / Week:2.5
Archived Since:February 12, 2009

Blog Post Archive

In the news: Passive-aggressive watermelon carving?

A Connecticut man was arrested last night for allegedly slicing a watermelon in a passive-aggressive manner. According to the police report, the woman said she felt the man was resorting to “passive-aggressive” tactics to “intimidate her because he is angry at her.” According to the Register-Citizen: The woman…was greeted by the sight of a watermelon, [...]

The taking tree

Our submitter lives in a group of eight cottages in Alameda, California. She writes: “One of my neighbors, Mark, has a lemon tree and he always tells everyone to ‘Help themselves!’ However, last week, someone took the last lemon — which really upset Mark. A couple hours later, we noticed what looked like a peach [...]

But what does the fox say?

Writes Kate in Pensacola, Florida: “There’s a new subdivision going up near me, and the farmer next door is NOT happy about it.” related: Oh, the rancher and the McMansioner should be friends

The sins of the father

Kyle didn’t even want to open the card he got from his grandma for his 20th birthday, because he knew he was in for something more than $5 bill. “The week prior was my family reunion, and my dad decided not to go — and not to inform my grandma ahead of time,” Kyle says. [...]

Have you called your mom lately?

Jaime and her husband live in a different state from her in-laws, but she’s not giving him a free pass. “To be honest, he really doesn’t call them as often as he should,” she says. related: Better late than never?

To the person who had corn for dinner last night

Although John in Oklahoma City is used to the office bathroom being papered with commentary from his coworkers, he found the imagery of this note to be…especially vivid. related: A diarrhea only toilet?

Sleepless in Sydney

William in Sydney spotted this note on the notice board of an apartment block he was visiting. If you’re going to tackle a DIY project, I reckon that Saturday morning is as good a time as any, no? Confidential to the notewriter: As someone who also a) lives in an apartment complex and b) works the [...]

Spoiled milk

“Kitchen warfare has become somewhat of a spectator sport around here,” says our submitter, of his office in Vancouver. Perhaps a Vegan Support Group is in order? related: Texts from Obnoxious Vegan Girl

The wizardry of water

Jake in Vermont says that the sign of the left showed up after the sign on the right failed to get the job done. (And you thought you’d never put that high school chemistry to use!) related: Right, I still don’t understand this water/ice thing extra credit: Mr. Wizard = kind of a jerk [youtube]

Polite notice, terrible font

Rebecca in London spotted this notice in her boyfriend’s block of flats. “While it’s true you do notice washing machines running, they’re not that loud,” she says. “On the night of the note being ‘edited’, there was defiant laundry running at 11:30pm.” related: Lord of the Laundry Room

“I’m not creepy, I swear”

Writes our submitter in Texas: “We live on a military installation, where the housing is notoriously small and right on top of each other. We’ve gotten to know our neighbors very well, and the author of this note is most likely someone we consider a good friend.” Our submitter humble-brags that yes, his wife is [...]

On Wednesdays we wear pink

Our submitter in Chicago found these notes were in her son’s 8th grade autograph book. “Only a few other students are going to the same high school that my son will be attending,” she writes. “These two girls are part of that group and seem eager to get on to the next year of flame-throwing. [...]

Rotten heel!

One of Allison’s coworkers recently became convinced that one of the evening janitors had it in for her shoes — different shoes. On multiple occasions. “Needless to say,” Allison says, “she didn’t last much longer.”   related: Or I will CUT YOU

The ultimate grandparent guilt trip

“I haven’t had a close relationship with my grandparents since I graduated from college 14 years ago,” writes Lindsay in Nashville. “I only see them a couple of times a year, so it’s typically pretty awkward when we get together. I have nothing against them, but they haven’t been involved with my life in so [...]

Kiss my carbon footprint!

Writes our submitter in Cambridge, UK: “There’s a master’s student living in our shared student house — the kind who lives off hemp protein and lentils. Anyway, the house has an hallway running through the middle, with his room on one side and a landing on the other. This note appeared on the landing the other [...]

A bit of a spat over the pitter-patter of little feet

Holly in Glendale, Arizona says her one-year-old daughter just learned how to walk, and (as toddlers do)  enjoys toddling around the apartment. Holly and her husband have tried explaining this to the downstairs neighbors, to no avail. “They bang on the ceiling, which scares the living sht out of my little girl,” Holly says, and [...]

It’s a great day…to move out of the house!

Alexandria in Australia says that the card she got from her parents on her 18th birthday (below) “is a pretty good summary of my formative years.” Dear Alexandra, I think this card expresses the fact that, although we both love you very much we find it hard to say, just like you do. All the [...]

Cookie Trolls

Look out Keebler Elves, cookies have a new mascot… in Poland anyway, where Karolina spotted this note warning her and her fellow coworkers not to indulge in any mid-shift snacking. Arguably a bit severe, but hey, as Kristie from San Antonio let us know, when you say it with a cookie, you speak from the [...]

Scapegoat of the Sea

Joanna in Boston says this started with “have a blessed day,” and has continued to escalate from there. related: Fish cookies, anyone?

You may not be stylish or chic, but Mom loves you anyway

“My mom mistakenly picked up a birthday card for my sister’s graduation,” writes our submitter in Canada. “The real gold, of course, is in what she decided to cross out.” related: For the conditionally beautiful bride

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