Blog Profile / 1000 Awesome Things

Filed Under:Lifestyle / Happiness
Posts on Regator:1038
Posts / Week:2.5
Archived Since:February 25, 2010

Blog Post Archive

#920 Getting that painful eyelash out of your eye

Eyeballs do not want to be touched. I mean, have you ever put fingers, algae-filled lake water, or shampoo in there? Yeah, that gets your eyes screaming in pain pretty quick, doesn’t it? Unless you’re using Johnson & Johnson’s No More...Show More Summary

#922 Getting a truck driver to blow their horn

Truckers have the best horns. Those things mean business. They’re loud and thundering and slap you in the face. None of this itty bitty bee-beep business that sounds less like a hatchback telling you the light turned green and more like a seagull telling other seagulls hey, there’s a guy throwing away crusts over here. Show More Summary

#923 Doing anything that makes you sort of feel like a caveman

There’s something about getting in touch with your inner neanderthal that strokes your brain stem just the right way. Accomplishing something caveman-style feels good — a combination of clenched teeth, throbbing veins, and good old fashioned feistiness that we don’t always get to experience in today’s sophisticated society. Show More Summary

#924 The fact that glass exists

Grab a handful of sand, heat it up to a few thousand degrees and suddenly, presto change-o, whaddaya got? That’s right, friend: a handful of glass and one severely burned paw. Now, how incredible is the fact that glass is made from sand?...Show More Summary

#925 Watching ‘The Price Is Right’ when you’re sick

At an early age, it is possible to learn the price of life through The Price Is Right. How many eight-year-olds know a can of chickpeas costs sixty-nine cents? How many twelve-year-olds can rattle off the features of a new solid oakShow More Summary

#926 That runaway truck ramp at the bottom of big hills

Hey, have you ever found yourself careening down a massively steep mountainside hill in a runaway eighteen-wheeler with the brakes cut? If so, there’s really no need to worry. AWESOME! Photo from: here — Follow me on Facebook — The post #926 That runaway truck ramp at the bottom of big hills appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things.

#927 A freezing cold glass of water on a boiling hot day

When your eyes sting from big salty beads of dripping sweat, your T-shirt gets wet and sticky and melts to your back, and your upper lip forms a splotchy sweatstache, then I say brother, it’s time for a drink. And what says refreshing...Show More Summary

#929 Your actual colon

Have you ever run the last leg of the relay? If you have then you know it’s a stressful experience, because you either make it or break it. I mean, you’re either ahead and it’s up to you to hold the lead, or you’re behind and it’s up to you to make it up. Everyone […] The post #929 Your actual colon appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things.

#930 Finally getting that tiny stuck piece of popcorn out of your teeth

You know when you can just feel that popcorn kernel stuck back there in swampy recesses of your mouth and it’s totally infuriating? Yes, your tongue slides past its smooth surface unsuccessfully, your toothbrush’s flimsy bristles just...Show More Summary

#931 Intergenerational dancing at weddings

Have you ever felt too old or too young on the dance floor? Maybe you and your husband signed up for a Saturday morning ballroom dancing class and noticed everyone else arriving on a shuttlebus from the old folk’s home. Or maybe youShow More Summary

#932 Wearing sandals when you definitely should not be wearing sandals

I went to college in a small town that got hit hard by weather extremes. In the Fall, the summer winds would quickly cool and sharpen, ripping into your cheeks on your way home from class, leaving them red and finely shredded, like you’d just applied blush with sandpaper. Show More Summary

#933 That first big scoop out of a jar of peanut butter

When I peel the top off a new jar of peanut butter I like to pretend I’m a scientist peering through the world’s most powerful telescope, catching Earth’s first glimpse of a new, strange and distant planet. “It’s got a smooth surface,” I exclaim to the lab of giddy professors standing breathlessly beside me. Show More Summary

#934 A sudden jolt of adrenaline

Did you know you have two little yellow, nine-volt-battery-sized adrenal glands in your body, just chilling out, maxin’, relaxin’ all cool on top of your kidneys? Someone told me this and I checked it out. Turns out it’s true. It seems...Show More Summary

#935 Stuffing your face with cookies like Cookie Monster

It sure is a sign of gluttonous satisfaction when you find yourself home alone, slouching on the couch in front of the TV with your eyes half open, a steady trail of cookie crumbs dripping from your mouth onto your shirt and pants, chocolate...Show More Summary

#936 Nailing that parallel-parking attempt on the first try

Have you ever been driving down a busy, two-lane road with cars parallel-parked on both sides and a long line of people driving in front of you and behind you? I have, and I tell you: it’s a terrible feeling. Most of the time I’d rather...Show More Summary

#937 The smell of fresh rain on a hot sidewalk

There’s just something about the smell of rain on a hot sidewalk. It’s sort of like the rain cleans the air — completely hammering all the dirt and grime particles down to the ground and releasing some hot, baked-in chemicals from the pavement. Show More Summary

#938 Old faithful sweatpants

Once upon a time, I used to work on a college newspaper. The paper was halfway-decent, with some really strong writers, editors, and layouters. And it turned into a really tight-knit group — probably the result of a lot of late nights spent together drunk on Country-Time Lemonade and laser printer fumes. Show More Summary

#939 Hot cream and a straight razor on your neck from the barber

Okay, first off, it just feels great. Because really, how often do you get something nice and warm smeared on the back of your neck? Speak up if you’re getting this action somewhere else, because we’re all ears. For me, it’s only when...Show More Summary

#940 Terrible businesses run by kids

When I was about fourteen years old, I signed up for something called Junior Achievement. It was a happy-go-lucky non-profit group that promoted business and entrepreneurship skills in children. Or basically, it was a bunch of kids in a room every Thursday night acting like middle managers with adult supervision. Show More Summary

#944 Your disgusting pillow

Back one day on a long road trip, I sat in the driver’s seat, Ty sat shotgun, and Chris sat in the back. We were trucking down a long stretch of highway in silence, just watching the world go by, when out of nowhere Ty suddenly turned to me and said: “Hey, how long have […] The post #944 Your disgusting pillow appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things.

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