Blog Profile / Copyranter

Filed Under:Marketing / Advertising
Posts on Regator:1472
Posts / Week:6.6
Archived Since:July 1, 2011

Blog Post Archive


(Activate your "TRIGGER" warnings) (Yet another post mocking the milquetoast Millennials.) __________ BOOMERS are the reason why Millennials are fucked, economically. Just ask them. Just read their Facebook updates. Gen Y is Generation Screwed, facing the worst job market since the Great Depression, according to several incorrect media sources. Show More Summary

The 19 worst "Business Teamwork" stock photos.

1. (four associates examine a bell pepper) I searched "Business Group Teamwork" on Getty and sifted through 41,177 photos to bring you this post. So thank me, you thankless anonymous assholes. I didn't sign in to remove the watermarks because, authenticity. Show More Summary

Men's Deodorant Marketing is Malarkey.

Remember: Mitchum—So Effective, You Can Skip A Day™? That was the Revlon brand's tagline for about 20 years, up until 2005. I mean, what the fuck do we have an FDA for if an antiperspirant can get away with that bald face lie? Today,...Show More Summary

Are Ad Agencies Still Cool?

(Back in 2011, one of the largest ad agencies in the world flew this banner over the hoards at the Cannes ad festival. Note the spelling of "famously".) Today’s ad agencies are nothing like Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce in the 1960s. They’re not even like Crispin Porter + Bogusky in 2005. Show More Summary

Brut has no idea what "a man" is.

(Like rape culture enabler Axe, Brut is a Unilever product. One of Brut's celebrity endorsers in the 1970s was footballer Paul Gascoigne, who allegedly let his man out by beating his wife.) Bros? Have you noticed more and more ads these...Show More Summary

It's Time To End The Cannes Advertising Festival.

The just completed 2014 Cannes Lions International Festival of Creativity made $28.2 million in entry fees alone, up over four million from 2013. British media company Top Right Group runs the Festival, after buying it from French businessman Roger Hatchuel in 2004 for £52 million. Show More Summary

The Great American Tagline Is Dead.

(One of my favorite taglines of all time) Nike ditched Just Do It last year. Apparently, they thought it too harsh for today’s soft generation, replacing it, temporarily, with the gooier Find Your Greatness. If sitting on your couchShow More Summary

Prankvertising Is The Worst Thing To Happen To Advertising Since The Starburst.

Pageviews. Today’s world has deemed them so vital, that it’s turned them into one word. Say the word in a marketing meeting, and ears prick up, eyes sparkle, and sometimes drool comes out of mouths. That’s because a video ad’s pageviews instantly turn advertising into science, which it absolutely most certainly is not. Show More Summary

BuzzFeed's Native Advertising Is Nothing But A Confidence Game.

BuzzFeed is worth a lot of money, maybe $1 billion. At least, that’s what they told Disney when the Mouse came sniffing at their hot ass earlier this year. BuzzFeed is not worth lots of money because of its lists or quizzes. It is worth...Show More Summary

Worst Ad of the Day—on Twitter.

I've started a " Worst Ad of the Day " daily update on Twitter.This Indian ad for Kurl-on mattresses featuring Malala Yousafzai—the Pakistani girl shot in the face by the Taliban—was a recent winner. It's by O&M India and, amazingly, is a real ad. Splendid.I update daily. Go here.

Social Media Dipshits: Stop Treating Us Like Fuckwits.

When are brand managers going to come to realize that metrics don't mean diddly-squat, and that their social media managers need to stop stealing "content" ideas from old Highlights magazines? Story Link, on VICE.

The Best Ads of 2014 You Haven't Seen, Part 1.

11 commercials, plus the above brilliant print campaign for a Swiss vegetarian restaurant. Story on VICE.

Two new fast food burgers are not to be eaten by women, according to their ads.

One commercial, via Carl's Jr., features a fake Mystique morphing into a beefy man before she bites a big-ass bacon burger. The other, by KFC Australia, fake-apologizes to "girls" for freaking them out. copyranter on Jezebel, LINK.

For the New York Observer—my weekly local NYC Bad Ad Report.

This week: Snickers isn't half as clever as they think they are; the newest sexy Times Square bed bugs ad; and there's a new ad buster in town—the Clownifier. LINK.

Think You Can Write Better Ads Than Convicted Felons?

Two young San Francisco copywriters used the Federal prison system's pen pal program to concept together with inmates on some ads. Some of them are not bad. Take a look—on VICE.

Ad agencies STILL have no idea how to talk to women.

I rounded up six recent ads—4 spots and 2 print executions—directed at or featuring women. It's a tough call which one is the most woman-hating. Story on Vice.

This Week's Local NYC Bad Ads Report.

I'm starting a new weekly column for the New York Observer. In it, I will be photographing and reviewing local bad ads, from above and below ground. Link.

American Car Ads are a Fucking Embarrassment.

If you watched the Oscars last night, you probably saw the above "American Exceptionalism" Cadillac commercial. It is, politics aside, one of the worst car commercials ever produced. But it's just the latest in a shitty string of awful American car ads. Read on VICE.

The Greatest American Copywriter Wasn't A "Mad Man".

He is a Midwestern son of a preacher who as an adman vomited before presentations, not from liquor like that hack Don Draper, but from fear—fear that a new client wouldn't have the balls to buy his ballsy ads. Read more about him, and see many of his best ads in my weekly post on VICE.

Copyright © 2015 Regator, LLC