Blog Profile / Copyranter

Filed Under:Marketing / Advertising
Posts on Regator:1540
Posts / Week:5.1
Archived Since:July 1, 2011

Blog Post Archive

What In The HELL Is Going On With Toilet Paper Advertising?

Since Mr. Whipple died in 2001, Toilet Paper Ads have gotten very strange and very bad. See for yourself— my post this week on Digiday—LINK.

Advertising Is Not A Science, Never Will Be.

Every Ad Tech "Guru" needs to read this memo by Bill Bernbach. It's from 1947. ( LINK ).

"Brainstorming" is useless

Come inside a digital agency's "ideation" room, and watch a good idea get destroyed. LINK on Digiday.

"Shit Copywriters Think"

The copywriter is still the idea of king of this stupid industry. Fuck everybody else. LINK, on Digiday.

On Shitty Copywriting.

Supposedly good agencies continue to produce really shitty ads. More here, on Digiday—LINK.

The Rise of the "Un-Ad".

It's not hard sell. It's not soft sell. It's un-sell.Read about it on Digiday— LINK.

Seven New Names for "Advertising"

Sir Martin Sorrell, the richest and mouthiest adman in the world, says we need to rename "advertising". So I did, seven times (including "Sorrelling"). See them here, on Digiday.

The Unparalleled Arrogance of the iPhone Taglines Continues...

For eight years, Apple has launched generation after generation of the iPhone with most arrogant yet meaningless slogans imaginable. I went ahead and wrote them some for next year's iPhone 7. LINK—on Digiday.

Top 9 Reasons You Should Quit Your Marketing Job.

Your words mean nothing.You create nothing.You are nothing. LINK on Digiday.

How to Advertise to Millennials.

Four spec ad examples of Millennial-targeted advertising from an expert. LINK—on Digiday.

It's time to kill Cannes. It has become an embarrassment.

(photo by Kurt Novack, 2014) Scores of scam ads + petty egotistical judges = kill the awards portion of the festival. NOW. LINK, on Digiday.

Ad Creativity vs. Ad Tech: It's an All-Out War.

Ad Tech is Donkey Kong. Ad Creativity is Mario.Who ya got? Story on Digiday.

New dog food ad ends racism in America.

Also, a new shampoo ad ends divorce in China.New trend of brands exploiting society's ills to sell product is despicable. LINK on Digiday.

Angry Aging Area Ad Man (me) Baffled By Bullshit Buzzwords.

Dickweeds are trying to make Advertising more complicated than it is.Curated Brand Experience? Ephemeral Content? Big Data? All bullshit. LINK on Digiday.

UPDATE: Sex No Longers Sells.

18-34 year-olds ain't buying what their selling. Story Link.

WTF is a Creative Director?

It’s a question I’ve been asked many times over the years by civilians: Just what is it that a creative director does? Sorry, but there is no quick, pat answer, especially nowadays, young millennial. Instead, I will circle the question, like a vulture, hopefully while avoiding shitting on my own legs, unlike a vulture. Read the rest on Digiday.

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