Blog Profile / Copyranter

Filed Under:Marketing / Advertising
Posts on Regator:1501
Posts / Week:5.9
Archived Since:July 1, 2011

Blog Post Archive

12 best commercials I found by accident in 2013.

On VICE:The 12 best commercials I found by accident in 2013.

Apple's Christmas Commercial is Transparent Pandering Bullshit

The disaffected Youngs with their faces buried in their fucking screens, win, and you lose, Olds!GOTCHA, GEEZERS!What a fucking Santa pants-load of shit, this ad is. How many teenage asswipes across the world will, yes, actually have...Show More Summary

One of the most incomprehensible ads ever created.

It's via Scott Hoy, Sioux Falls personal injury lawyer.See a re-imagining of Hoy's holiday ad — which features his floating, talking disembodied head — and many other atrocious December ads, branding, and social media updates in my weekly column on VICE ( LINK ).

If Lawyers Wrote Ads

On VICE : what if lawyers had written some of the greatest ads and taglines from the Mad Men era? They would have been...a lot less great. LINK.

The two stupidest Nelson Mandela ads ever produced.

(click ads to enlarge)He was a great man, unquestionably.And these two ads are not great, unquestionably.Top — an ad for Inchalam nails, by Ogilvy & Mather, Chile. STAY STRONG. No further comment necessary.Bottom — an ad (headline: Life is easier, if you don’t speak up. Show More Summary

The best Christmas ads for people who hate Christmas ads.

If, like me, you can't stand the seasonal schmaltz, the mushiness, the faux feel good hooey, go to VICE and watch four commercials that actually treat consumers like sentient human beings — including the CANAL+ Nativity ad, above. L...

The "O" stands for Japanese Zeros.

Tora, Tora, Tora, SpaghettiOs and Campbell Soup Company (parent).Image via. Previously in: Twidiot of the Week.

This is pretty much the most racist commercial I've ever seen.

It's for an Alabama law firm.That, and more on my weekly ad post on VICE.

This is the Doritos "Crash The Super Bowl" winner.

For the eighth straight year, Doritos will be "crashing" the Super Bowl with non ad agency ads. You can see all the submissions here. I've viewed many of them, and most of them suck balls, as usual — not that that's any different from when a Doritos ad agency creates the ads.But this one, "Finger Cleaner", is a winner. Show More Summary

The Worst Advertising, Guerrilla Marketing, and Social Media Fuck-Ups of November.

Including, this idiotic giant stress ball placed by the Jamaica Tourist Board in Times Square.Read about it, and the rest, on VICE.

So, here's the most offensive JFK assassination-riffing ad ever produced.

(click ad to enlarge)Leaving aside the nuclear offensiveness, it's actually a pretty good b-to-b ad. And yes, it is a real ad, from 2007, for IP Press (now known as IP Media Group) hawking their men's titles which include Belgian mag Ché — well known for over-the-top sexist ads.Ad agency: Antwerp office of Duval Guillaume

Meet Phil, The Sleazy Dick Pill Shill.

He's pushing, pushing real good, Dynafil (thus, his nom de guerre), a new generic Viagra.Read about him on Jezebel.

The only ad James Gandolfini ever did (I think).

2007, for Kobold watches.The ad ran for a year.Gandolfini did it for free.Here's the back story.

Me, right after every creative presentation.

That's me, in the foreground.And, that's the rest the agency "team" in the background.

FINALLY: some funny cereal ads.

These two "Competition Crunch" spots for Oatmeal Crisp are my kind of stupid. They may not be your kind of stupid, but stupidity — like love — is a many splendored thing. "Elitist Marionette" (above) is really fucking weird. "Ginger Wedding" (below) is more traditionally ad-like weird. Show More Summary

PETA's new Thanksgiving video is a fucking holiday miracle.

A miracle, in that it isn't the usual sexist, insensitive garbage. The video, "Thanks!—An animated trip to holiday slaughter" is well-thought out and well-produced. The video, "Thanks!—An animated trip to holiday slaughter", is a collaboration...Show More Summary

There is one ad agency in the world that knows to advertise itself.

And they're not from the United States or the UK. Read about them on Vice.

copyranter on VICE: Prudential Presents: The most depressing financial commercial ever produced.

I will be, starting today, writing somewhat regularly for Vice.Today's post is about a new ad by "The Rock".Basic plot: The world is a cold place where losers die. Fuck you. Signed, Prudential.( story link ).

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