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This Woman’s Ability To Eat A Slice Of Turkey In Under One Second Is Why She’s Your New Hero

WHAT?Howthe…Holy!Imean…WHAT?Where’ditgo?!Shehooveredthatsliceofturkeydirectlyintoherstomach.ThatisAMAZING.Ihavenoideawherethistalentmightcomeinhandyinreallife,butIapplaudher.LettermanneedstogetthiswomanonStupidHumanTricksimmediately.I’mconvincedshehasalungfullofslicedturkey.

Meet The Naked Man Who Went On A Pot-Smoking, Poop-Smearing Spree Inside A Philadelphia Police Station

Aww.ThisonehappenedjustthreemilesdowntheroadfrommeingoodoldUpperDarbyPA,otherwiseknownas TinaFey’shometown.It’snicetoseeyourcityinthenewsnowandthen.Anyway, around 11:30a.m.onSunday,33-year-oldCarlenHiggswanderedintotheUpperDarbyPoliceDepartmentandstartedramblingincoherentlyaboutwantingtoseeapoliceofficer.

Here’s What It Would Look Like If Men Created A Tampon Commercial

Tampaxistheperfecttamponforthatthingthathappens.Thisfascinatingbitofmarketingbrilliancecomesfromtheparodyadabove,“broughttoyoubythetheall-maleadvertisingteamatTampax”—buttrulyconceivedbyNewYorkcomedysketchgroupHammerkatzNyu.Yes,theadsatirizesmaleignorancewithregardstothemenstrualcycle,butit’salsoaprettygoodsellforthebrand.

An Elderly Japanese Man Was Arrested For Dumping A Quarter Ton Of Porn In The Middle Of A Park

Theideaofhavingtodisposeofyourporncollection,orafriend’sinthiscase,isprobablygoingtobeaforeignconceptsoonenough.WithawealthofcontentrightatyourfingertipsthankstoanInternetconnection,it’salmostunheardoftohaveaphysicalcollectionofpornthesedays.That’swhatmakesstorieslikethisarareandincrediblebeast.

Check Out Oak Lawn Toyota’s Horrendous Commercial Parody Of SNL’s ‘Dck In A Box’

IcaughttheSNL Christmasspecialtheotherweek(youknow,aweekaftertheThanksgivingspecial)andtheyobviouslyincluded“DckInABox”amongthegreatesthitsfromtheirholidayepisodes.Itholdsupprettywellconsideringitisalmosttenyearsoldatthispoint,soIguessthat’swhythefolksatOakLawnToyotadecidedtouseitfortheirholidayadcampaign.

A Man Penned A Furious Open Letter To Russell Brand After The Actor’s Protest Ruined His Lunch

Lastweek,actor-turned-revolutionaryiconRussellBrandmadenewsyetagainwhenhegotintoitwithNigelFarage,theleaderoftheUK’sIndependenceParty,ontheBBC’sQuestionTime.BrandaccusedFarageof,amongotherthings,drinkingtoomuch,andFaragehassincerespondedthatBrandisthetypeofrevolutionaryleaderwhohashischesthairsflat-ironed.

US Officials Are Saying That North Korea Is Behind ‘The Interview’ Hack Attack

ItwasnosurprisethatTheInterview woulddragabitofcontroversybehinditonitswayintotheatersthankstoastorylinethatfeaturedafictionalassassinationattemptontheleaderofNorthKorea,butthedevelopmentsoverthelastfewweeksandespeciallythelast48hourshavebeenastonishingandabitterrifying.

Watch This Angry Woman In A BMW Drive Off With A Boot On Her Car

PRO-TIPI:Don’tdrivewithabootonyourcar.PRO-TIPII:Definitelydon’tdrivewithabootonyourfancyBMWSUV.AwomanataBadGirlsClubaudition(arealityshowonOxygen)attemptedtodriveawayafterabootwasplacedonherbackwheel(presumablyforparkingtickets).Shesucceedsbutdoesmassiveamountsofdamagetohercarintheprocess.

Missed the Kickstarter?

If you missed your shot at the deals we had during the Pretty Princess Kickstarter, it’s not too late! Via Backerkit, you can still pre-order some of the goodies that were available to Kickstarter Backers. Take a look and see if anything entices you: https://devils-panties-pretty-princess-plushie.backerkit.com/hosted_preorders. Show More Summary

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