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New York Today: Drying Up

Wednesday: A dry month, more hot weather, and summer's delicacies.

Unfortunately, They’re Attending A NAMBLA Meeting

Dad: How old are you?Teen boy: Thirteen. Dad: How old are you?Mom: You know he’s thirteen. Dad: It says here [gestures to brochure] that if you’re eleven or younger, you get in free… How old are you?Teen boy: Oh. Eleven.–Roxy DeliOverheard by: Kelsey

Wednesday One-Liners Ignore the Bloody Hand

Little old lady to little old hubby: Fuck you, Dick, I am not crossing against the light! I can’t do it. Fuck you!–Houston & LaGuardiaOverheard by: Almost peed on myself from laughingLittle tourist to mom: We are jaywalking, yay!–Outside Sak’sOverheard by: also jaywalkingGuy on cell: … So it’s fucked up, nights in the city. Everyone […]

Free Outdoor Summer Yoga Classes Around NYC

Hey, whatcha doing tomorrow after work? Up for some child's pose on a big-ass lawn? Cool. Here's your guide to free summer yoga around the city. Mondays: Brooklyn Bridge Park. Get the details. Tuesdays & Wednesdays: Hudson River Park. Show More Summary

That’s Why It’s a Pin and Not a Sticker

Bus driver has huge sign pinned to his sleeve clearly reading, “Yes, I stop at Willowbrook Mall and 23 Park/Ride.”Woman boarding bus: Do you stop at Willowbrook Mall?–Port Authority

From the Long-Awaited Ernest Goes to ESL

Girl to old man in baseball cap: What does the “E” on your hat stand for?Old man: (unintelligible)Girl: The “E”? What does it stand for?Old man: (unintelligible)Black lady observing scene: E stands for the English he don’t speak.–A TrainOverheard by: Brenda

That's, Like, All We Did in Bio Lab Last Year

Girl #1: Did you know babies have natural reflexes? Like, if you stick your finger in their hand, they'll grab it, and if you try to pull it away, they'll hold on to it for like a minute.Girl #2: Did you know if you punch a baby in the face, it'll cry?–Columbia UniversityOverheard by: mkb

And They Always Get Drunk and Abrasive When We Go Clubbing

Greenpeace guy: Hey! Do you care about the environment?Angry student: No.Greenpeace guy: How about polar bears?Angry student: No.Greenpeace guy: Well, why not?Angry student: They're not tasty.–Outside Columbia University

City acts to tamp down hysteria over de Blasio zoning plan

The de Blasio administration’s citywide rezoning proposal, although it is being diluted and could be changed further still, continues to frighten community leaders. Yesterday, Park Slope Civic... To view the full story, click the title link.

What NYC pays the MTA (it's more than the state does)

The Metropolitan Transportation Authority wants the city to cough up additional funding, but a new analysis reveals the city's government, residents and businesses already send it more cash than... To view the full story, click the title link.

Crackdown on vending's black market has only made things worse

After Oscar Vivar arrived in New York from Mexico 27 years ago, he worked in restaurants—at times enduring 12-hour shifts—six days a week. After 14 years of low pay and long hours, he... To view the full story, click the title link.

That One Guest Seems to Live in the Mirror

Suit #1: So where are you going on vacation? Suit #2: St. Bart’s. Suit #1: Are you staying in a house or at a hotel? Suit #2: A house. God, I hate hotels. Inevitably there will be one guest that irritates me; I’ll see him around at lunch or something. Then I’ll obsess about it, […]

Maybe You Shouldn't Have Sex 'til You Can Answer This Question

Bi-curious guy to gaggle of girls: He wakes up every morning, looks in the mirror and says, “I hope I don't have herpes.”Girl #1: Has he gotten tested?Bi-curious guy: No, he's too afraid.Girl #2: I would be too if I'd been around that much dirty snatch.Girl #1: Wouldn't you be able to tell if you […]

I'm Not Following You; We're Riding the Bus Together

White girl, yelling to black friend: Heather! Come to the back of the bus and sit with me!Heather: I ain't no Rosa Parks!–Bus, Brooklyn

Taste of the Upper West Side to Host Its 8th Annual Culinary Festival

There probably isn't a better way to begin the new season than to enjoy delicious grub from some of the world's best restaurants and chefs. The New Taste of the Upper West Side comes back for its 8th annual food festival omorrow, May 27th.

Wednesday One-liners Read in Union Square

Stoner: We’re on the verge of a spiritual revolution. It’s like Fight Club…but without the violence. –Union Square Overheard by: braun bowery Guy: The fact that bar was full of ugly girls is just ridiculous. –Union Square Crazy lady: Fine, stay where you are, Linda! Stay on the streets, stay in the gutter…but put all […]

Oh, and My Head. My Head Is Hollow

Latino with kid’s bike #1: Yeah, he wants to change Father’s Day to ‘Dad Gets a Free Lap Dance Day.’ And he wants to call Halloween, uh… He wants to call it… uh… Yo, why’s it called ‘Halloween,’ anyway? What the fuck is Halloween?Latino with kid’s bike #2: ‘Cause you know the word ‘hollow,’ like […]

Extra, Extra: The Definitive Commandments Of Riding The NYC Subway

NYC gas stations are dying, RIP Mary Ellen Mark, a clever dog, Broome Street Firehouse torn down, NYU reconsiders criminal applicants, a cat maze and more day's end links. Don't forget to follow Gothamist on Twitter and Instagram, and like us on Facebook. [ more › ]

Video: How To Best Enjoy A Blissfully Empty Bryant Park

The below video (courtesy of Improv Everywhere) looks like a daydream we once had while sitting on a packed Bryant Park lawn during their popular summer movie series. Just imagine being able to kick your shoes off and do flips all over the place without that conservative Glenn Beck getting in the way of your happiness. [ more › ]

Crossbreeding Humans and Bees: A Cautionary Tale

Woman #1: Ooh, the Macy’s Flower Show is out. We should go see it. Crazy guy: Psst! Psst! Flowers? I like flowers! Where are they, where can we go see them? Woman #2: The Macy’s Flower Show is going on right here. Woman #1: I actually don’t think the Flower Show has started yet. Crazy […]

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