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Nobody Knows What To Do With America's Secret Nuclear Ice Base

Back in the early years of the Cold War, America started construction of a secret underground base in Greenland to house nuclear missiles within range of Moscow, kind of like our cold Cuba. In the 1960s we figured out that it wouldn’t work, so we peaced out without telling anyone or removing any of our nuclear waste, now chillin’ under a hundred feet of ice. Ice that, we now know, will soon melt thanks to climate change.
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