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Newswire: Shia LaBeouf just got married in an appropriately weird ceremony

When we last checked in on human art project Shia LaBeouf, we discovered that giving up alcohol had allowed him to ascend to an entirely new plane of LaBeoufness where he’s no longer dangerous to be around but is still prone to ridiculous decisions like getting matching Missy Elliott tattoos on his legs even though he’s in the middle of shooting a movie. He had become a LaBeouf who was no longer driven to incite chaos, but instead was comfortable containing the chaos within himself.
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